Fake New Year Resolutions


Brianna Pritchett, Messenger Reporter & Business Manager

New Year, New Me, right? Once again, another year rolls around and everybody begins to fix their insecurities. The New Year is an amazing way to begin to create positive changes in your life. Though that doesn’t mean the changes are easy, and honestly, hardly anyone ever finishes their resolution. Starting a resolution and not finishing it isn’t that big of a deal, it happens to the best of us, but sometimes as humans we can’t help but feel embarrassed at our lack of effort to keep our goals up. Finding a few ways to fake working on your New Year Resolution is key to a successful 2017. Follow my advice to learn how to succeed in the realm of failure.


The classic “I’m going to become a lot healthier”, is quite possibly the most used resolution in the world and hardly anyone ever completes their goal. Claiming to become more healthy in the new year is basically saying that for a few weeks of your life you will attempt to make some changes but slowly forget why you even attempted it. Health is important, don’t get me wrong, but our temptations can’t resist chocolate cake forever. If you’ve made a statement to begin working out or eating healthier that you do not want to carry out, but you don’t want to admit to your peers that you weren’t strong enough to meet your goals, you can always cover it up with some healthy lies. Working out? That’s no fun. Start your new years in a fun way, instead of spending 5 nights a week at the gym invest your time into more fun activities. Spend some time at the movies, or go to Petsmart for a couple of hours and pet the puppies. Just spend around an hour and a half away from your house bettering yourself and your mental health with happy activities, then when you arrive at your house hours later, your family will surely believe you were at the gym. Over a period of time, they may notice you haven’t been losing weight like you planned to but I’ll leave the extended lies up to you.


Now that was just one example, but take that example and form it to your own goals. There is nothing wrong with giving up on some goals, trying to cover up your goals with lies can really make people feel guilty but just know that everyone lies at some point in their life. Don’t guilt yourself over a few fake stories or a fake New Year resolution. Good luck on life in 2017, I know I’ll need a few lies to get me through this new year.